Day 10

The floor crew came by this morning. They took out a few of the tiles and dry laid them to see what they look like. Then they left for the day.

Karma is not pleased.

Day 9:

Making a mountain out of a mole hill.

The crew came back today to install the concrete board on the floor.

According to the installer, there is a mountain under our house. The floors aren't level. Three different contractors have told me the same thing. However, each of them pointed to different places where the floor rises. Evidently there is a mountain range under our Florida home. Funny thing, I never noticed any dips or raises on the kitchen floor. 

I asked the installer if the boards would make the floors level for the travertine. Travertine is a soft stone and can crack and chip easily. He said there is no way to make that floor level. And he left it there and walked away. After my initial freak out of "OMG, why are we installing travertine on a lumpy floor", he explained to me that the boards will make it flat. Which will be fine for travertine. So evidently there is a difference between flat and level in contractor language.
I asked him if the travertine needed to be sealed. He said, yes, travertine needs to be sealed initially and redone once a year forever. But, he didn't factor sealing the travertine into the estimate. WTF!!!!

Tips for Travertine: Don't drop anything heavy on it, no stilletto heels, and don't install near an airport.

These floors will be the death of me.

Day 8

The crew has decided it is too pretty outside today to work. They dropped off the tile at 1:00 and are playing hooky. I, however, am left to play in the renovation dust.

P.S. I would like to thank my wonderful partner, Matt for staying out of town during the worst phase of the renovation. I am so glad you have not had to tolerate the jackhammers, chisels, hammers, dust, debris, farts, burps, belly rubs, ass cracks, blocked driveways, footprints, smudges, barking, overflowing trash cans, chemical smells, peeling paper, flying plastic, paint drips, and the overall emotional rollercoaster ride of seeing your home destroyed by strangers. This is so much easier when only one of us is freaking out.

Day 7.5

So,  I've decided to play a little prank on the floor installers tomorrow morning.

Day 7

I got home late from Ft. Meyers last night. The only thing I noticed before going straight to bed was a fine layer of dust on everything. The plastic is not doing it's job.

 And I got up this morning to find something missing from the bathroom.

Good thing we have a privacy fence. 

                                            

They arrived early today to work on the floors again. Chiseling, hammering, scraping, repeat. Over and over and over. All day long.
The island is gone. And so is my patience.



Lesson learned: Make sure you get a final estimate on installation BEFORE they break up your existing floor.

Day 6:

Hell Day has arrived. Deconstruction has begun. They started tearing out the tile on the floor at 8:00 am this morning. It sounds like a dentist working at 140 decibels. Drilling and hammering and drilling and hammering. Interrupted by the occasional burping and farting. Yes, burping and farting. Evidently all that chiseling loosens up body gas.

Lesson learned: tell the contractors not to eat Mexican food before chiseling out your floors. Stinky!

I'm leaving town!

Day 5:

We decided since we were killing the evil garden wallpaper, we might as well get rid of kilt on the bathroom walls as well. They were distracting, to say the least. Who puts plaid on a wall?

Fortunately we were unable to save the bathroom mirror. So now we have to redo the entire bathroom. Damn.





                                                                                                 

Day 4:

               



Kill it. Kill it before it grows!












1982 called and they want their wallpaper back. Luckily, Pat Sullivan from Wallpaper Plus has come to my rescue. The atrocity that has plagued me with nightmares since moving in is being removed today. He says it will take a day and a half to property exorcise my kitchen of this evil print wallpaper.

 I suspect this paper will not go quietly into the night. Pat said one of the best ways to remove is stubborn wallpaper is to spray it either Downey fabric softener or vinegar. If you have paper like mine, a combination of holy water and Napalm is the better option.

Day 3

The plastic comes down and our new textured ceilings are revealed. Eddie did a wonderful job and finished on time. I am cautiously optimistic this renovation wont result in a nervous breakdown.

They even cleaned up the mess. I highly recommend these guys. At least until I get the bill.

Day 2:

The kitchen ceiling tile is down and Eddie from Eddies Drywall Enterprise is hard at work scraping the remains. Eddie is from Albania. I was concerned about the paint drying patchy on the dining room ceiling. Eddie says, "Don't worry".  I was concerned about the drywall mud and dust getting on my patio brick. Eddie says, "Don't worry".  I was concerned about global sea elevation rising. Eddie says, "Don't worry".  Eddie is my new zen friend.

Day 1: Ceilings

Lesson learned from last time: Matt and I have different timelines on renovation projects. So, we hired a contractor to do the work this time. The contractor assures us that everything will be done by Thanksgiving. Secretly, I have my doubts.

Today the ceilings are getting done. Its supposed to be a 3 day job to repair the dining room ceiling, remove the ceiling tile from the kitchen and retexture both rooms.

The first step is to make sure everything is covered in plastic. I mean everything. If these guys were at the Dallas hospital, the Ebola outbreak would have never happened.

   

             This is a great excuse to eat out.










The dining room is first. There was a minor flaw in the ceiling where it seemed to dip every so slightly. Turns out, the previous renovators had nailed up the ceiling drywall instead of screwing it in. As the ceiling settled, a couple of nails had pulled the tape away. So, now we have to screw in the drywall, re-tape and retexture the entire ceiling. Patching it would make it look worse.

Lesson learned: Screw your drywall like a 2:00 am booty call!!! And do it often. Having to retexture the entire ceiling because of a couple of sloppy nails is expensive.

The ceiling work continues tomorrow in the kitchen. 

Once bitten, twice bitten.

The Nightmare begins
We are at again. We finished the house in Beaumont and now are redoing the kitchen and dining room in our 1924 colonial in Jacksonville, Florida. I really must be a sucker for pain. Other than the horrific wall paper and the schizophrenic dishwasher, the rooms are in good condition. But, good evidently isn't good enough in our house.

The Before